Loretta Garvey Kay, 7 September 1896 – 13 September 1981

Our maternal grandmother, Loretta Garvey Kay, was born on the United States’ very first Labor Day, 7 September 1896. That is 124 years ago today. And this year, her birthday again falls on Labor Day.

There is a funny mix-up associated with Grandma Kay’s birthday. She celebrated it on the wrong date—September 5^th—for nearly 65 years! It wasn’t until she applied for Social Security that a perpetual calendar revealed the first Monday in September 1896 actually fell on the 7^th.

When I asked Grandma Kay how such an error could be made, she replied, “People didn’t keep such close track of things back then. They probably recorded my birth sometime afterwards. They knew I was born on Labor Day, but just didn’t remember the exact date correctly.”  But Grandma didn’t mind. After learning of the mistake she just celebrated her birthday all month long, as she said, “to make up for the mix-up!”

Grandma’s parents were Martin Garvey and Mary Ellen “Minnie” Doyle. Grandma was baptized as Mary Margaret Loretta Garvey at Our Lady of the Rosary Church in Niagara Falls, New York on 2 October 1896. Her godparents were her maternal uncle Charles Doyle and her paternal aunt Honora Garvey. From at least 1905 onward the family lived at 540 Thirtieth Street in Niagara Falls.

Grandma Kay finished school at the eighth grade. She told me, “That was as long as most people went in those days; that was like finishing high school is today.” Afterward she worked in the box factory at the Shredded Wheat plant in Niagara Falls. Our cousin Kerry tells us Grandma also worked in a laundry and that is where she met Howard Bertram Kay of nearby Youngstown, New York.

Grandma and Grandpa were married August 2, 1916, at Our Lady of the Rosary Church rectory. Their attendees were Grandpa’s friend Jack Reizdorf and Grandma’s sister Mildred. Grandpa was tall and Grandma was a shortie. She often told me, “Howard loved to stretch his arm out straight and show people how I could walk right under it.”

Grandma and Grandpa Kay made their home in Youngstown, first living at 104 Second Street, and later buying what had been Grandpa’s parents’ home at 500 Second Street. Grandpa ran his plumbing business out of the home and Grandma and Grandpa raised their eight children there. Grandpa Kay died on December 9, 1941 after a long bout with cancer. Grandma, still with several children to support, went to work at the post office.

500 Second Street remained Grandma’s home for the rest of her life. Her girls’ weddings were celebrated there; her Youngstown kids and grandchildren had coffee there every Sunday after mass; every Garvey,  Kay, Andrews, Whalen, Mock, or Urbank relative who was able to come met there annually for the Youngtown Firemen’s Labor Day field days—and Gram’s month-long birthday celebration. Grandma Kay died there on Grandparents Day, 13 September 1981.  

When I look back over my childhood, I recall my happiest and most enjoyable days as those spent visiting Grandma Kay. The long car trip was exciting, Grandma and our aunts and uncles always seemed happy to see us and our cousins were fun to play with. When our mom died, it was Grandma Kay who sat next to me, holding my hand, during the funeral.

As I grew older Grandma and I had lovely, long conversations. She always took the time to talk to me, to answer any questions I had about the family or about her life growing up. When I got married she welcomed David as another grandchild. Our daughter Kerry’s baptism was held at St. Bernard’s Church in Youngstown and Grandma invited all the relatives to her house to celebrate Kerry’s arrival.

Grandma Kay was loving, funny, feisty, sociable, and as easily brought to tears as to laughter. She was proud of her Irish roots and faithful to her religion. I love her and miss her very much, but more than that, I enjoyed her. I am so very grateful for every moment spent with her.